Thursday, June 26, 2008

7 secrets of homebirth

7 secrets of homebirth from a dad’s perspective

1. In a home birth you are no longer relegated to the bench. Before the birth itself there is more to think about in a planning and logistics sort of way, ranging from buying equipment to manly jobs like making sure the birth pool hose actually attaches to your taps. On game day you are not just a big hairy thing whose only use is to be squeezed viciously or swore at. You are in charge of the birth pool, maybe even catching the baby (I'm doing that next time). And, aside from the mother, who will be a little preoccupied, you are the only person in the building who knows where all the towels are. If you have ever read The Hitchhikers Guide, you'll know how vital that is.

2. You'll lose less hair and gain less wrinkles.

Having a baby is always frightening on some level, if you're not scared out your wits you must be medicated or dead inside. With a homebirth though there are less things that stress you out and feed the ugly fear monster within. Think of it: No traffic. No worry of getting lost. No worry of the car not starting. No worry that you've forgotten something. No pacing corridors. No worry about what's happening. No corridors to pace. No smug doctors. You'll still be worried, but it won't consume you. Besides – in a home birth, you have too many jobs to do to have time to let your fear monster run free.

3. Home is where the heart is.

Not to mention Cd's, DVDs, the PlayStation... All your comforts. Your music, your TV, your favourite mug, your fridge, your magazines, your books even your beer I guess. You'll be more relaxed, the mum will be more relaxed and the baby will be more relaxed too when he/she pops out. I'll be honest, despite the stimulus of worry and excitement, births are pretty boring. Maybe I have a short attention span, but it's not, you know, entertainment. And we all know they can go on a bit. With a home birth you will be a thousand times less bored as you can take a break and read a magazine or flip on the idiot box for a bit. Hell, it's probably less boring for the midwifes too.

4. Say goodbye to the little things that kill Me?

I hate hospitals for a million and one small and big reasons. Looking back now I can't believe I didn't jump for joy when Bel mentioned having a home birth simply because I wouldn't have to go to one. My main problem with hospitals is this - the idea of being surrounded by sick people sounds like a bad strategy if you want to stay healthy. Plus there are hundred small things: it smells bad, the foods nasty, it's demeaning to find you way by following coloured lines on the floor and most importantly, when your newborn arrives he/she won't be woken up by someone else's screaming child. Hospitals suck, home rules!

5. You don't have to live the delivery room cliché of the hapless and scorned father.

You know the one - where the woman in labor hates her husband and screams blue murder into his face, punches him etc. Either that or she is so medicated and spaced out she doesn't even know what a father islet alone who you are. With a home birth her labor is undisturbed. She does not have to be picked up halfway through and rushed to the hospital. I cannot state enough how much a difference this makes.

6. You are He-man of the home, you have the power!

That's right. It's not the power of gray skull though, it's the power of being the master of your environment. It's a subtle difference, but one you will notice. Your home is your place. You pay for it. The-midwives and guests are the fish out of water. If they want something, they ask you. There's a funny thing about evolution, it has created the subconscious trait that whoever gives out the food is the dominant player in any situation. That's why in a home birth you will find it feels a lot more natural to ask more questions about what's going on, to make sure that the birth plan is stuck to and to generally be more involved and have more say over the whole thing.

7. You won't have your surprised, fragile heart ripped out.

If you only remember one of these secrets, make sure it's this one. At the end of a home birth, the midwifes leave. Not you. This is the way it should be. In a hospital, you will be torn away from you newborn child and your exhausted wife at the very peak of your emotional vulnerability. Let me paint the picture for you real quick: two weeks before my eldest daughter was born my Dad had died, we were not financially safe and I didn't have a job. In short, it was tough. But being the alpha male I am, I wasn't showing it and being the rock solid guy I like to think I am. But the instant I saw my new daughters face I discovered a vein of happiness and a depth of feeling that washed away my ego and my fears and even helped me come to terms with my Dad's recent death and made me, a mainly scientific sort of thinker, to almost see a thread of symmetry within life.

Written by: Ven Batista

Thursday, June 19, 2008

How does your Garden Grow?

Good morning all! I just wanted to post a few pics of my Garden. I am so excited about it. We have peas, greenbeans, corn, squash, pumpkins, carrots, sweet potatoes, Sunflowers, and cotton (don't ask about the cotton, I just thought it would be cool to try and grow some). I have been at this garden since late february when I started everything from seed inside our laundry room. Nathian has been fairly inamered by it, everyday he wants to see his flowers growing. Well today he finally gets to see a true flower. The funny thing about it is I was just talking to my mom yesterday about out gardens and they planted pumpkins too. I asked her if they had any flowers on theirs and she said no. I told her that the buds had popped out on ours but there was no sign of when they would open, then just an hour ago I walked out to water and there in the middle of the pumpkin patch was a beautiful golden flower. YAHHH!!
Here are a few pics of the other wonders that are going on in our Garden.
Sweet potatoes
in a tire.
Carrots in one too
Cotton in another
Green Beens growing on Corn stalks
And of course
the Corn
And Mia is learning to Whistle
(She's getting ready for next years America's Got Talent)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Trying to finish my midwifery study orientation

I have been working for the last 5 days trying to finish up my orientation work so that I can actually start focusing on my studies. I am very close to being finished but the part that I am doing not is very tough. I have to buy two books to finish up one of the assignments but the problem is I have to spend $220 for the books. Now in the long run $220 is not a lot of money, especially when these books are going to be what helps me to be the best midwife I can be. I have been putting off finishing the orientation process because I just hate doing the prep work for anything, I would rather just get in there and do it. YET, I know that I have to do it all from start to finish. ( I wouldn't want to go to a doctor that just JUMPED IN and started practicing) SO all in all it is just a slow and pain staking process but soon (by the end of the month) I will officially be studing to be a midwife (not that I haven't been studing for the past few years, but now I will be getting credit for it). On another note, I am struggling with my boys. Nathian is getting into everything and back talking all the time. He just wont listen to me at all, everything I tell him is wrong. I am so frustrated with him right now and I don't know what to do. Yesterday when we were at the neurologist the doc gave us another medicine for him to take along with the Adderall and a smaller does of Adderall for him to take in the afternoon. The Clonidine is a bloodpressure medicine that they have found helps ADHD children control their implusive behavoir (like being destructive yelling being violent) The only problem that I am seeing so far is that it also makes him sleepy (which sometimes makes him more crancky). I have to find the right time to give him the meds because giving him both in the AM is not going to work. This is going to be hard but I am thankful that Ben will be off for about two weeks so we can play around with the dosage times. Lincoln, I don't know how to explain Lincoln. He is starting to yell a lot. he will not talk properly. He refusses to use his tongue and all the sounds that he makes are vowel sounds and when you can't understand him he then starts to yell and get upset and of course it makes me upset and so it just keeps going back and forth. He also cries at the drop of a hat, he has no problem inflicting pain on anyone else but if he steps on something or if Nathian hits him or even runs into him, he will scream and cry and act as if you have torn his arm off. Somedays he asks as if he doesn't hear you. We do have a referal in for him to have an audioligy exam but that could be weeks from now and I am so frustrated I don't know what to do. Mia is starting to fuss and scream a lot now too but I don't know if she is just reacting to all of her teeth coming in at once and an ear infection or if she is starting her twos early(by about 9 months) I have been working with her since she was born on sign language so that she doesn't have to yell at me to get something but lately it is like she has never seen a sign in her little life. The boys are yelling all the time so she thinks that that is the only way that she will get the attention that she wants. i am at a loss for what to do. Okay enough venting I guess. They are saying now that they are ready for a nap so that is a good sign, hopefully they will sleep for a while and I can get some work done. Thanks for listening.